Preparing for mediation
What to Bring to Divorce Mediation: A Document Checklist
The income, account, property, debt, and parenting documents that let a mediation finish in one session instead of three.
Income and employment
- Your three most recent pay stubs, and your spouse’s if you have them
- The last two years of federal and state tax returns with all schedules and W-2s or 1099s
- Bonus, commission, or overtime history for the last two years
- Benefits summaries: health insurance premiums, HSA, life insurance, stock or deferred compensation
- For self-employed spouses: profit and loss statements, business tax returns, and a list of business-paid personal expenses
Accounts and investments
- Statements for every checking and savings account, including joint and individual, dated as close as possible to the date of separation, plus the most recent statement
- Brokerage and investment account statements
- Retirement statements: 401(k), 403(b), IRA, TSP, pension summary plan description or annual benefit statement, and military retirement documents
- College savings accounts for the children
- Cryptocurrency holdings and account exports
Real estate
For each property: the deed, the current mortgage statement with payoff, any home equity line statement, the most recent tax value, and any appraisal or market analysis. If a premarital down payment or an inheritance went into the property, bring the documents that trace it, such as closing statements and bank records. Tracing evidence is usually the difference between an argument and an agreement.
Debt
- Credit card statements with balances and account numbers, noting whose name is on each
- Vehicle loan or lease statements and payoff amounts
- Student loans, including origination dates
- Medical debt, tax debt, and any collections
- A credit report for yourself, which often reveals accounts you had forgotten
Personal property and vehicles
Bring titles and values for vehicles, boats, trailers, and equipment, and a simple list of significant personal property: furniture, tools, jewelry, collections, firearms, and anything with sentimental weight. Most personal property is divided by agreement, and a list keeps that conversation short.
Children and budgets
- A proposed parenting schedule, including holidays and summer.
- School and activity calendars, plus costs for childcare, camps, sports, and tutoring.
- Health insurance premium for the children and typical uninsured medical costs.
- A realistic monthly budget for your new household, and one for the children’s expenses.
- Any existing court orders, temporary agreements, or restraining orders.
What not to bring
Leave the shoebox of text messages at home. Mediation is not a trial, and time spent proving who was wrong is time not spent building an agreement. Bring the documents that establish numbers and the two or three outcomes that matter most to you. If you have a lawyer, ask them what to bring and whether they will attend. If you do not, consider having counsel review the agreement before you sign.
Talk with a mediator about your situation
Mediation Solutions helps families, businesses, and litigants in Huntersville, Charlotte, Locust, Albemarle, Rock Hill, and Fort Mill resolve disputes privately. Call or text to ask about scheduling, fees, and whether mediation fits your case.
Offices: 9620 Sherrill Estates Road, Huntersville, NC 28078 · 217 W. Main Street, Locust, NC 28097 · Virtual sessions available.
Frequently asked questions
Do I need appraisals before mediation?
Not always. Many couples agree on a value or agree to share one appraiser, which is cheaper than competing experts.
What if my spouse controls all the financial information?
Say so before the session. The mediator can structure an information exchange first so both sides negotiate with the same facts.
Should I bring a lawyer?
You may. Some parties bring counsel, others consult an attorney before and after the session. The mediator is neutral and cannot advise either side.
How current should statements be?
Bring statements near the date of separation and the most recent ones, since North Carolina values marital property at separation and accounts for later changes.
This article provides general information about mediation in North Carolina and South Carolina. It is not legal advice, and reading it does not create an attorney–client relationship. As a mediator, Christopher Adkins serves as a neutral and does not represent or advise either party. Statutes and court rules change, so consult a licensed attorney about your specific situation.