Custody and parenting plans
The complete guide
For the full walk-through of court-ordered and private custody mediation, parenting schedules, waivers, confidentiality and the leading North Carolina decisions, read Child Custody Mediation in North Carolina: The Complete Guide.
Child Custody Mediation in Huntersville, Charlotte, and Locust, NC
Create a parenting plan that fits your children, your schedules, and the distance between your homes. Private custody mediation for parents in Mecklenburg, Stanly, Cabarrus, and York County, SC.
Two paths to a custody agreement in North Carolina
When parents cannot agree on custody and a case is filed in North Carolina district court, the court generally sends the dispute to its Child Custody and Visitation Mediation Program. That program is free, is run by mediators who work for the court, and requires an orientation class followed by a mediation session. It focuses only on custody and visitation. It does not address child support, property, or other financial issues, and attorneys do not attend the sessions.
Private custody mediation with Mediation Solutions is different in several ways that matter to busy parents:
| Court custody mediation | Private mediation | |
|---|---|---|
| When | After a case is filed | Any time, including before filing |
| Issues | Custody and visitation only | Custody plus child support, expenses, the house, and other separation issues together |
| Scheduling | Court calendar, orientation first | Flexible, including virtual sessions |
| Attorneys | Do not attend | Welcome if either parent wants counsel present |
| Cost | Free | Private fee, usually shared |
If your case is already filed, the court may waive the court program for good cause, and an agreement to use private mediation can be one reason, subject to the court’s approval. Ask your attorney or the court’s custody mediation office how that works in your county.
What a strong parenting plan includes
A parenting plan should be specific enough to prevent arguments and flexible enough to fit real life. In mediation we work through:
- Legal custody: how decisions about school, medical care, religion, and activities are made, and what happens if parents disagree.
- The regular schedule: week-on/week-off, 2-2-3, 2-2-5-5, alternating weekends with midweek time, or a schedule built around shift work or military duty.
- Holidays and breaks: Thanksgiving, winter break, spring break, summer vacation, Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, birthdays, and teacher workdays.
- Exchanges: times, locations, who drives, and how to handle Interstate 77 or Highway 24/27 traffic between Huntersville, Charlotte, Locust, Albemarle, and Rock Hill.
- Communication: co-parenting apps, phone and video calls with the children, and response times.
- Travel and relocation: notice for out-of-state trips, passports, and what happens if one parent wants to move.
- Future disputes: returning to mediation before filing a motion, which saves time and money later.
How private custody mediation works
- Screening and intake. Each parent speaks with the mediator about the children, the schedule each parent proposes, and any safety concerns. Mediation is not appropriate in every case, and we take domestic violence and coercion seriously.
- The session. Parents meet together or in separate rooms. The mediator keeps the focus on the children’s needs and helps each parent test proposals against school calendars, work schedules, and distance.
- The written agreement. Agreed terms are written as a parenting agreement. Many parents ask to have it entered as a consent order so it can be enforced by the court.
Good to know: in North Carolina, what parents say to a court custody mediator is privileged and cannot be used as evidence, and signed parenting agreements from the court program are submitted to the judge to be incorporated into a court order. Private mediation communications are also generally confidential. Custody orders can be modified later if there is a substantial change in circumstances affecting the children.
Custody mediation for South Carolina and cross-state families
Many families in our area live on both sides of the state line. A parent may live in Fort Mill or Rock Hill while the other lives in Charlotte or Huntersville. Which state’s court decides custody depends largely on the child’s home state under the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act, which both North Carolina and South Carolina have adopted. In South Carolina, contested family court issues, including custody, are generally subject to court-ordered mediation. Christopher Adkins is a South Carolina certified family court mediator and can mediate York County cases. Learn about South Carolina mediation.
Talk with a mediator about your situation
Mediation Solutions helps families, businesses, and litigants in Huntersville, Charlotte, Locust, Albemarle, Rock Hill, and Fort Mill resolve disputes privately. Call or text to ask about scheduling, fees, and whether mediation fits your case.
Offices: 9620 Sherrill Estates Road, Huntersville, NC 28078 · 217 W. Main Street, Locust, NC 28097 · Virtual sessions available.
Frequently asked questions
Will the mediator decide who gets custody?
No. A mediator does not decide custody or make recommendations to the judge. Parents make the decisions, and the mediator helps them reach terms both can accept.
Do the children attend mediation?
Usually not. Parents mediate on the children’s behalf. In some cases, parents agree on age-appropriate ways to consider an older child’s preferences outside the session.
Can we include child support in the same mediation?
Yes, in private mediation. Parents often resolve the schedule and child support together, using the North Carolina Child Support Guidelines as a starting point.
What if there has been domestic violence?
Tell us before scheduling. Mediation may not be appropriate, or it may need safeguards such as separate rooms, virtual sessions, or staggered arrival. North Carolina courts can waive custody mediation where there are allegations of domestic violence or abuse.
Can we mediate a change to an existing custody order?
Yes. Parents frequently mediate modifications when schedules, schools, or work change. The agreement can be submitted to the court as a modified consent order.